I Want To Heal But I’m Scared To Change

No-one ever cured, healed or resolved their illness WITHOUT CHANGING STUFF!!

I used to be cynical and almost arrogant about this subject in the past, but I can tell you I have softened and become much more compassionate and understanding as I’ve aged. I really understand the resistance and fear people have, even though I can clearly see how holding on to the past is so dangerous.

Be determinedWhen you have persevered, struggled, battled and surrendered with health, wellbeing, toxic beliefs and hidden traumas, and come out the other side, as I have, you just want to grab everyone and scream,’Come One!! It’s so much better on this side!’

But life is not like that and we each have our own karma, our own life story, our own destiny. At the end of the day love is the only thing that matters. Change IS love. It’s not what we do on the outside, it’s how much love we give and receive that brings us to our real humanity. the rest of it is just icing on the cake.

The post today Is actually one I wrote in 2013 when I was quite feisty and even angry still. I have edited it for today, but I just found it and the point it makes is a good one and worthy of some inquiry.

You see I have met many people, and you may have also (you may even be one of them) who do really want to take charge of their lives, their health, their weight, their dis-ease, their (anything), and they DO want to heal, BUT they don’t want to have to change the things that need changing in order to do it. That means they don’t want to take the external actions, address the internal emotions and beliefs, wounds, traumas, toxic values and relationships necessary to facilitate that healing and transformation.

This was my post (amended):

The conundrum many thousands, indeed millions of people face in all areas of life when meeting difficulty goes something like this;
“Yes, I really want to (heal my illness, get fit, find the perfect partner, become rich, be happy) BUT I don’t want to have to change myself too much. The subtext reads, ‘I don’t want to change my thoughts, I don’t want to resolve my rage, fear and pain. I can’t face the truth. I don’t want to utterly transform myself until I am no longer the person I was, and I certainly don’t want to change my habits’.

‘No, I want all the good bits to happen, but since I still, deep down inside, believe that nothing that happens to me has anything to do with me and I’ve just been cursed by bad luck, I just want someone to wave a magic wand and make everything turn out alright.’

Enter the Medical Profession stage left, and shuffling right behind them the Pharmaceutical Industry.

If you imagine that you can get to where you want to go, particularly if you want to heal illness, WITHOUT CHANGING FUNDAMENTAL ASPECTS of your thinking, emotions and behaviour, permanently (and I might say, for the better) then you are going to be very frustrated and feel really stuck for a long time.

We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.” Einstein.

But boy do we try!

Let’s just turn our attention to healing illness. The current pathology that drives sick people to go cap in hand, uninformed and desperate, to the doctors, consultants and other professionals, is a monumental societal sickness itself.
And for lifestyle, emotions, beliefs and habits NEVER to be addressed by these professionals sets up the powerless victim mentality that plays into the hands of the greedy corporate monsters who simply do not care about healing or cures but only about profit and perpetuation. BUT THIS IS THE RUB.

No-one ever cured, healed or resolved their illness WITHOUT CHANGING STUFF!!
The collusion between doctor and patient around this is laughable, if it wasn’t so sad. Doctor and patient both consciously or unconsciously talk about diabetes, heart disease, cancer, inflammation and the treatment of it, but very rarely do they have the genuine conversatioLight-Being-MEDn about what habits, thoughts, emotions, foods, drinks, or relationships are contributing to said problem.

We have got to get a grip on this catastrophic nightmare of stupidity we are suffering from. How people can create their sickness (as I did), trot off to the surgery expecting a miracle and never address what THEY actually did to create the sickness in the first place is beyond me!

We are Powerful beyond measure.
We are the creators of our lives and our experiences.
We are vast electrical bio-computers with access to the divine.
We stand in our own way.
We are capable of anything, from healing our illness to creating our illness.
Whatever we believe, truly believe deep inside, we will do.
We can live from our magnificence or we can live from our smallness and victim hood. It’s our choice. It is up to us to inform each other of that choice.

Fear. Fear is the great big Elephant in the room for most people. Fear is the foot on the brake of desire and the invitation of evolution. Fear is a necessary evil. It serves great purpose in protecting us from danger in acute situations, but when it becomes a chronic condition it plays an inflammatory role. There is a connection between acute fear and acute inflammation and chronic fear and chronic inflammation.
One of the problems is that we cannot distinguish between healthy fear and unhealthy fear. Between fear that serves us and fear that limits and diminishes us.
Thats a big problem.
Fear easily makes us stuck. Being stuck makes us vulnerable to authority. Fear makes us undermine our own authority.

You are going to have to get to grips with fear to make the changes demanded of you. 
The good news is that most fear is an illusion. You can only know this when you have been through the ‘veil of fear.’


Change is the greatest constant. We think we can stay the same. We like what we are, or we are afraid of changing. But we are changing anyway, as is everything around us.

The truth is that when we embrace the hidden gifts that life offers us, whether through illness, relationship, or money, we find new and unexplored areas of ourselves, new vistas, new inner countries to explore. And we change and grow into deeper and wiser human beings. Refusing to change is like refusing to grow up, hanging on to childhood when it’s obvious it’s over. When we embrace the transitions life offers us ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN, but it is always enriching.
And society grows richer because of it.
Kavi Portrait 2 copyEmbrace whatever life is throwing at you, it’s your gift, even when it’s real tough.

Thank you for reading.




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