I’m writing this blog today for anyone who thinks they cannot heal chronic disease.
I’m writing this for those who have cancer, those who have inflammatory conditions, those with blood issues and all the chronic ‘hopeless’ conditions.
And I am writing this for the consultants and doctors who, over the years, dismissed my notion of healing my condition as ‘impossible’ and even stupid. Yes, I’m writing this in defiance and wrathfulness.
I am not angry anymore, but for years I actually was angry at them for giving me so little hope and so few options.
Now I see part of my mission on earth is to spread the news to ordinary people, to show them that there ARE possibilities, and there is hope, and how we should never give up and resign ourselves to what other people, even if they are so called ‘professionals, say.
If I had listened to some of those voices many years ago, if I had followed some of their professional advice and let myself be led like a horse to water, I can only imagine what state I would be in today, ten years later. It wouldn’t be good.
You see, when I was first diagnosed with inflammatory bowel disease in 2005 in a London hospital I was told in no uncertain terms that I would have it for life, I would probably be on medication for life, and that I may have to have surgery to remove some of the infected areas. That is a colonoscopy.
Here is the report they sent to my doctor. Click to view in detail.
If you look at the report it suggests I should be started on a drug called Asacol.
It is an immunosuppressive, which is something I will never understand. I have just, for the first time, searched on Google for the possible side effects of this drug and I found crazy things!
Here is the link, have a quick look.
For a start, some of the ‘side effects’ are actually exactly the same as the effects from the colitis itself! Like ‘ulcerative colitis aggravated (up to 15%)‘
But when you are prescribed these drugs it is very very rare that you would be told about these side effects. They are terrifying! Worse than the disease itself.
And here is the thing. Chinese herbs and acupuncture, Ayurvedic herbs and treatments, herbal medicine, naturopathic remedies, NONE of them have any side effects. And they DON’T suppress the immune system. They will support and modulate the immune system, but there is a big difference between this and forcing the system to quell its activity. To me one is force the other is healing.
I have just found another great article about this:
Well that fateful day I was told of the possible future I faced is forever etched in my mind, for the single reason that I chose, as it says in the report, not to take their advise but to follow my own instincts and knowledge and pursue natural treatments. At that stage I had no idea what those natural treatments would be, but I already knew Ayurvedic (Indian) and Chinese herbs were very powerful and useful, so I imagined I would start there.
But that is not my point, that is for another blog. My point is always this, and I have said it before time and time again.
Despite what little hope I was offered that day, and during subsequent assessments and diagnoses, I never took any medication at all. NONE, ZERO, ZIP. And that was quite tough, because my symptoms got pretty serious at a couple of points.
In fact a recent discussion with my doctor about something else involved him asking me about my natural healing path and how I coped with the ‘acute phase’ of this dis-ease. ‘Good question,’ I thought and answered, because it meant he was taking me seriously. It is the acute phase that lands most people in hospital with very serious symptoms that demand urgent intervention. The answer was that I let it flow, and that meant sometimes 20 bowel movements a day and pouring mucus and blood (sorry for the squeamish among you!). Remember I wasn’t taking any meds, so I thought of it all as somehow the natural actions of a body in crisis.
Although it was mentally and emotionally very challenging, I tried hard to see that what was happening was the body taking the right action to try and eliminate toxins and pathogens and restore balance. The body was trying to detox and purify, but the effect was dramatic.
There is a big difference between seeing your own body from a compassionate, supportive and caring position, and seeing your body as having gone wrong and being angry, or fearful, or brutish with it. Your body hears and knows and responds to what you feel and say and think.
I know what I’m saying is hard and challenging and even with the best will in the world, sometimes intervention and hospital, medications and urgent treatment, are the only way. That is, as they say, the way it is.
I think what I am saying is to always look at your own mental attitude towards yourself and your body. Although I was freaked out by what was happening to me over the years it took me to heal, I never viewed my body as my enemy. I devised meditations and healing visualisations for myself to listen to every day. I explored my unconscious mind and emotions to the deepest level I knew, and left absolutely no stone unturned in my commitment to supporting the healing process, no matter what. I became a servant of my own healing.
Doctors don’t know about the healing journey. Most people don’t. We are all thinking in the same box most of the time. It is very limited. It is a mindset that works when it works, but when there is a breakdown, the mindset is sadly lacking in its ability to explain it or deal with it.
It is the same in mental health, psychological problems, addictions, and even societal problems.
We are caught in this mechanistic mindset that reads symptoms in a linear manner and attempts to rectify problems by medication, removal or incarceration.
Very rarely do we hear anything about healing, rehabilitation, forgiveness, compassion. Yet these are surely vital aspects of the human species?
I never took any medications, and it has now been over ten years. And guess what has happened? Well slowly slowly, and sometimes very slowly indeed, and sometimes forward and sometimes backwards, I have healed my wounded colon and reduced my inflammation, restored gut integrity, nurtured and nourished the physical needs of my body, dealt with emotions and mind, and now, for the last two years at least…
THERE HAVE BEEN NO SYMPTOMS OR SIGNS OF THIS ‘LIFE LONG DIS-EASE.’
I don’t think about it any more. Occasionally if I am suffering with something else, it can trigger some gut sensitivity, because I think I will always be sensitive in that area. And I have a tendency to immune weakness. I took a hard blow back there and I believe these hard blows, when they are chronic, always leave their mark, as though this is where we always need to pay attention.
But on the day to day level, there are no signs of IBD, colitis, or anything. Even I am shocked sometimes. My symptoms were powerful back then, for example I was almost 90% housebound for two years, I weighed less than 45Kg, had sometimes 20 bowel movements a day and was always losing blood and mucus, I couldn’t eat anything, was nauseous and semi anaemic. It was hard core and I had to dig so deep into my inner resources just to stay with it.
But I did.
And you can. Whoever is suffering from a ‘chronic dis-ease’ hear me good.
Your strength of character and spirit are amazing! Great read and inspirational 🙂
Thanks! You gotta do what you gotta do. I just couldn’t face the alternative, no way no how, not without trying everything else first x bless you for commenting. x
Thank you for sharing, above all else it provides hope 🙂
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