Motivation and the Healing Path

I have just been scrolling through my site here and considering my book ‘The Power of Illness to Change Your Life,’ and what it is actually about.

I have realized that it’s really a motivational book, and I am a motivational speaker and writer and coach. Not a conventional one by any means, but I am motivational by nature. It is who I am, and who I have always been. I bring hope, I bring some light and some love, not on the surface but to the heart and soul.

In that sense, and I explore this somewhat in the book, whether physical healing happens or not is not the point.

Healing is what actually happens in the heart and soul of each one of us. The physical body, and our lives, are set to perish anyway, sooner or later. It’s a sad truth but there it is. And of course we want to hold on to health, and remove disease, for as long as possible while we are here.

But finding acceptance, peace, love and a deep spiritual connection, is more important. Those are qualities that transcend the physical body, the ego self and all its fears and anxieties and open the door to something entirely new.

That’s the motivation I have. It’s the willingness to face all this, and open my heart and mind in the midst of it. I had to, when I was ill and suffering, I had to make peace with myself, with my past demons, with my family and with God.

You see, I have learned over a long period of time that this life I was graced with, is a voyage of discovery, an ongoing conversation and relationship between me and God. God is the entirety of existence, everything that I see, feel, experience, touch and know. The whole world I encounter is God. I believed myself to be separate from all of life, and life was somehow happening to me.

And over the course of a long healing journey that belief perished like an old ghost and I found myself to be in the world, the world in me, and all was one thing. I became existence and existence expresses itself through me.

Until that time I had a beef with God.

And I saw that each man and woman carries the same wound. We are all the same, but with our own stories. Me and you, we are the same, all struggling with existence itself, how to live, what to do about death, how to relate, the whole thing.

Now there is such a peace and love and acceptance. So there is a great motivation in me to support others as they walk the path of healing, however it appears for them. I don’t preach, I don’t tell and I don’t persuade. I motivate through a kind of holistic logic.

Each man and woman carries the same existential wound. We are all the same, but with our own stories.

Why I’m saying all this is not to sell you my book. It is because the path of life, like the path of healing, is pretty tough, challenging and mysterious. We are called to dive into the unknown. When the body is sick and we are called to the unknown it’s nigh on terrifying, because we desperately want to know what to do to heal the body. The body is a ruthless teacher. There is no simple answer.

There is the journey, the relationship, the inquiry, the awareness, the self love, the diligence, the persistence, the knowledge, the softness and the warrior-like ness that may transform us.

In the dark we are scared. That fear blocks our natural intelligence, our intuition. It creates cellular dehydration and shuts us off from the light, both inner and outer, and that is where some of our intelligence comes from.

My aim is to help people past fear, not avoiding it, but not giving it more power than it warrants. Fear is a powerful voice, but fear must be met with discernment. When discernment listens to fear it knows whether it’s worthy of taking action or not. That comes through experience.

I think my book was a rough attempt at this motivation. Some people have read it a few times and used it in the way it was intended. We need each other to say ‘Yes I did it, you can too.’ And then it gives us just enough encouragement to put the next foot forward. 

Does the body always heal?

No. 

Do it anyway, for the sake of your heart and soul. It is more important to find the depth of loving acceptance while you are here. The healing journey is an invitation to this depth of love.

That is what happened to me. Illness definitely changed my life. For the better. It allowed me to meet myself and transform fear into love.

I hope this speaks to you if you are on the path.

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Detoxification – Gentle, Dramatic or Unnecessary?

I have just looked back at my blogs for the past year or so and noticed I have never really talked much specifically about detoxification and whether it is important, what it means, what I have done and what you might want to do.

So here goes.

I am biased. Lets get that clear right from the start. Until 2004, and from that time on, I had never heard of ‘detoxification.’ Even though I had seen Chinese doctors and a homeopath, I had no idea what it really meant, or whether it was relevant or not.

I was sick by that time. Toxic, inflamed, rosacea all over my face, liver problems, passing out, pain everywhere, headaches and generally feeling tired and deathly.

Since that time, as well as being incredibly ill for a number of years (some of you know my history of Inflammatory Bowel Disease, and since then Hashimotos (thyroid), fungal issues and mysterious rashes), I have done some MAJOR detoxification programs, treatments and home remedies.

My own personal view, born from experience, research and other people’s testimonies, is that detoxification is fundamentally important for real health and healing to happen. As I said, I am biased. I don’t believe I would have made the recovery I have without some major detoxification.

But I know the mainstream medical establishment doesn’t recognize it as valuable, in fact doesn’t recognize it, period. They would have it that the body is self regulating and can sort itself out, no need for this modern quackery.

But the proof, at least anecdotal proof, is there for all with eyes to see. People who don’t do any detoxification of any sort get sick. people who are sick and go on detoxification programs stand at least a chance of getting healed.

What is detoxification?
Wikipedia tells us: Detoxification or detoxication (detox for short) is the physiological or medicinal removal of toxic substances from a living organism, including the human body, which is mainly carried out by the liver. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Detoxification
They tend to use the term to describe those coming off addictive drugs or those who have been poisoned.

To be sure, there is clinical detoxification, usually in the form of methylation of toxic heavy metals. This is a good article: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3239317/

The issue I’m really addressing is the alternative arena. From juice fasting to water fasting, from liver enemas to colon cleansing, and from Ayurvedic Panchakarma treatment to Raw Vegan Diet, you can pick a method and experiment, try one for a few days, get bored and jump to another, ad infinitum. And if your issue is weight control, and you have read or been told that detox is going to do it for you, you can spend years jumping from one method to another method, and spend a lot of money and waste a lot of time.

There is nothing worse than going through the hardship of a severe detox program only to abandon it after realizing that it’s not doing what it ‘says on the packet.’ It’s frustrating and disheartening.

But if you are sick with chronic disease, and it’s getting worse, or you have been diagnosed with cancer, and it’s urgent, and you are called to try detoxification, you don’t have the luxury of ‘trying things out and jumping ship.’

Honestly, I’m not saying I have any answers at all. I just want to open up the conversation to a more open minded one. I don’t much care for closed minds and entrenched positions, even from experts. So let’s be clear, I’m just talking around the whole subject here, and mostly only from personal experience. Search the internet and talk to lot’s of people, experts, those who have been through detoxification and healed, and those who haven’t, and find out as much as you can before you dive in.

And when you dive in, do so fully. Half hearted detoxification is an absolute waste of time. In fact stirring up the hornets nest of toxins that might be hidden inside your body, in places strategically placed there years ago by an overloaded liver, might be the worst thing you could do.

I have done 3 Ayurvedic panchakarmas in India, each one between 4 and 6 weeks. Not a week or a few days. 6 weeks! Thats a long time to be cleaning the body. Believe me , it’s incredibly deep and extremely powerful. And not just on the physical level. It impacts mind, body and spirit.
A short explanation of panchakarmahttps://www.ayurvedichealing.net/panchakarma/

Of all the modalities and programs I have tried, this has been the deepest and most transformative. It gets to places other methods don’t. It gets deep into the joint, tissues and even the bones. It softens the body up over time so the body willingly releases what it no longer needs. It works WITH the body, not against it. The trouble with many modern detox methods is that they feel quite aggressive. And I have discovered that you just cant’t force the body to let go of what it’s held onto for years. It has to be encouraged through softness.

The root belief here is that toxins lie dormant in the body and accumulate over the years. These toxins, in the form of heavy metals, pesticides, herbicides, all manner of coloring agents, plastics, and dangerous chemicals, as well as parasites, viruses and other antagonists, are often stored by the liver when it is called to deal with something potentially harmful to the body but not able to be eliminated. Over time, it could be years and it could be decades, the build up of accumulated toxins, coupled with bad diet and no exercise (for example) creates the ‘overflowing bucket syndrome,’ and that is when disturbing persistent and increasingly dangerous symptoms manifest, the kind that cannot be ignored.

That is when the disease is often fully diagnosed. It has been coming for a long time, drip by drip. But it was neglected or dealt with ‘half’heartedly’ and then bam!

Very often this is also when medication itself is used, which may suppress symptoms for a while, but the big trouble with medication is….It is toxic!

The argument for detoxification is that by practicing focused and proper detoxification, not just once but as a new ‘lifestyle’ choice, removing the antagonist toxins embedded in the body’s hiding places, that body can start the healing process. Toxins put such a load on the body it’s impossible for healing to take place at the same time as their presence. So to heal it makes sense that toxins must have to be removed. The body will heal when it can turn its attention fully to that healing. But while it is preoccupied with the inflammatory effects of its current toxic load it can barely survive, in fact as we see, it often can’t. That’s chronic disease right there.

That is why those who have really delved into the true power of detoxification are absolutely dedicated to it’s power and efficacy. I have to admit to be one of those people.

So, if I have gone any way towards convincing you detoxification might be useful, and I hope I have, which kind is most useful, dramatic or gradual?

Answer: BOTH.

I’m not as in favor of the dramatic as I used to be, simply because of the fact that change takes time, the body takes time, and healing takes time. Unless you have been poisoned, chronic illness and symptoms haven taken time to build up, and they will surely take time to recede into the background. If you start a genuine and consistent healing foods detoxification program and keep to it, it will surely help.

But you should do this anyway, regardless of your state of illness or not. Eating seasonally, AS WE ARE DESIGNED TO DO, naturally supports a kind of seasonal elimination and recalibration. Nature does this anyway, animals do it. We have forgotten because we can buy everything imported and we don’t grow our own crops.
This book by Dr Duillard is fabulous about eating seasonally and naturally. We have the paperback but this ebook is a bargain right now. https://lifespa.com/3-season-diet-ebook-flash-sale/

If you couple this with some deeper and more radical cleansing, possibly some fasting when done properly, or a panchakarma if you can find one in the west (even a 5 day is good), or a good clinical methylation to remove heavy metals, you will begin to feel benefits.

The thing that I have noticed is that its the mental attitude to detoxification, diet and healing, that really underpins whether it might work or not. If you aren’t really into it, if you have massive doubts, or if you approach it with the half heartedness I talked about, you are onto a loser. If you embrace the adventure and the unknown, the absolute mystery of it, you might be very surprised by it’s power.

Remember this. Nearly ALL old religions and cultures have practiced one form of detoxification or another. Consider Jesus going into the desert for 40 days and nights. Consider Ramadam, a month long fasting program, and of course Ayurveda itself is rooted in ancient history. Steams, saunas, even sweat lodges, acupuncture and chinese medicine, all attend to the detoxification process, and all are ancient practices. It’s been around for a long time.

So this blog went much longer than I expected, and it’s not even touched the surface. I am no expert on this. But I honestly believe that my healing has in large part been down to so much detoxification. Don’t dismiss it, and if you aren’t really healing , maybe it’s because you are not really getting deep enough into the body.

Some detoxification methods  have done:
Panchakarma x 3
21 day water fasting plus many days fasting
Intermittent fasting
Juice fasting
Liver Cleansing
Colon Therapy
Seasonal eating
Raw Food diet for 3 years

Thank you so much for reading. Please comment if you can add anything useful or just drop me a line.

Have a great day.

Kavi

What Disease?

How did I heal Ulcerative Colitis?
I didn’t.
What I did was remove what was triggering the inflammation and reactivity in my struggling body.
All the words ‘Ulcerative Colitis’ mean is ulceration of the colon, inflammation of the colon. That is a description not a disease.
It turned out to be toxic residue from years of drug abuse.
It turned out to be heavy emotional burden and traumas from youth.
It tuned out to be heavy metals.
It turned out to be liver stagnation.
It turned out to be lymphatic congestion.

All these were resolved almost fully with serious and focused detoxification and nourishment of the organism.
And with serious and focused emotional healing, releasing what was stuck in the body and mind system.
And getting some health going again.
With exercise, fresh air and relaxation.

At no point did I do anything about ‘Ulcerative Colitis.’

But magically, or obviously, by the time I finished my 21 day water fast, and since then, I have had NO SYMPTOMS at all of this disease they call Ulcerative Colitis.

As far as they are concerned I still have it.

As far as I’m concerned its vanished because I didn’t have any ‘disease’ in the first place. I had symptoms, sign posts, indicators of deep issues that were causing me big problems.

I hope you get this and show it to anyone who has chronic issues.

Don’t let the diagnosis define you. Think bigger and deeper.

Get wise and aware.

Is Chronic Disease the Price we Pay for Modern Life?

I think we have a problem. A big problem facing the whole of society, no matter which country we are in (unless its a very natural and simple one far away from modern life)

That problem is that we are in danger of accepting chronic illness, and particularly auto immune related illness, AS THE NORM. We are in danger of accepting that auto immunity is a natural response to a toxic environment, and we are attempting to pacify the body, hide the symptoms and label the disease but we are not, en masse, or from the highest level of politics, doing anything about it from the environmental perspective.

I believe we actually think that chronic disease is the price we pay for modern urban living.

AND IT MAY BE TRUE.

When we draw back and look at this issue from a collective, national and global standpoint we see some terrifying patterns. Obviously from the personal position we don’t care about global patterns or what it’s even caused by, because we are so preoccupied and taken up with our own journey of healing or intervention. But if the very root of our illness is our constant reactivity to aspects of our environment that we can never escape then we have a problem. We will never heal enough to feel great or truly healthy, but we will simply carry around low grade or high grade symptoms and fend off acute illness for as long as possible until we finally succumb.

If the very root of our illness is our constant reactivity to aspects of our environment that we can never escape then we have a problem.

So many people are sick. So many people are chronically sick, acutely sick, low grade sick, only just able to function sick.
Chronic disease is epidemic, no one doubts that. Since the 20th Century burst open, with its wars and its extraordinary industrialization, its chemicals and factories and intense farming, chronic disease has been growing. But since the 1990’s and the turn of this Century things have escalated, and as far as I see, hear and experience as I travel around, they don’t look like stopping. It is out of control. If it was murder, terrorism or car crashes we would be freaking out. But because it is chronic illness we don’t bat an eyelid.

Wow!

My feeling is thus: We should NEVER accept chronic illness as normal. Just because its the appropriate response of the immune system and nervous system to a toxic and highly stressful, chemical laden, environment, that in itself is no reason to accept it as normal. We have to do everything and anything, personally and collectively, environmentally and politically, to deal with the environmental triggers, to reduce chemical toxicity, to clean up air, water and city, to actually study wifi and discuss the dangers.

Here is what we can do. GET AS HEALTHY AS POSSIBLE, without being tight or rigid about it. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not talking about diets or losing weight (I DO mean finding your natural weight), I am talking about doing everything in your power to detox your lymphatic system, clear up your gut health, reduce stress, improve sleep, hydration and vegetable intake. Choose organic and non GMO ALWAYS! Exercise the body, sweat and breathe. Release emotional stuckness, rigid thoughts and beliefs and RELAX! Get out in the sun, dance and walk in nature. 

Remove toxic products as much as possible from your life, your house, bathroom and car. They are everywhere. Research what is natural and buy it. Prioritize health above almost everything else, except maybe your kids. If you have kids, prioritize THEIR health! 

Did I say sort out your gut? Detox your brain, your gut, your liver, heal your adrenals and kidneys. Research the dangers of wifi and start to do what you can to protect yourself from the danger. At least don’t sleep with your phone.

All of this you could do, sick or not. And I promise you it will help your body defense system deal with today’s toxic load. You will be the healthiest person in the hospital. And even though you may still be diagnosed with some chronic condition you won’t even feel it because you will be strong and healthy. A strange idea I know but it seems to be the times we live in.

Let me know what you think.

Reactivity in Auto Immune Conditions and Inflammation

Please do not take this as scientific proof. If you are looking for modern science you probably wont find it here. This blog and website is only about ideas that might be possible.

As I always say in my blogs and posts, find out for yourself what is true. Believe nothing unless you truly believe it deeply inside. And if you don’t know, be ok with not knowing and make your inquiry into healthy living and illness come from an unknown perspective.

Basically, develop discernment and inner wisdom, it will serve you for life and help others who also don’t know.

My conversations are speculative and holistic. I’m trying to connect dots that medical science doesn’t want to, or can’t, or won’t, connect. Mainly that means exploring the connection between matter and thought, or body and mind you might say.

I want to look at patterns, beliefs, language, energy fields, that sort of thing. I truly believe we only have a small bit of the puzzle of being human. Most of the rest of the puzzle will not be found in science or conventional medicine.

But the puzzle and the mystery is where the exciting stuff is. That’s where I like to dig around. I am an investigator and explorer.

So I have been contemplating the nature of auto immune conditions, described by conventional medicine as ‘self attacking self,’ and decided to talk a little about how our emotional mental ‘reactivity’ to life, thought and situations may play a very big part in perpetuating the suffering of self attack.

The key here is to understand why reactivity, particularly over-reactivity, is happening on the mental, emotional level, and to attempt to ease it down and relax it. In my world awareness and understanding is fundamental in the healing.

Reactivity tends to come from fear. That fear can be fear of danger, fear of lack of safety, threat to life, violence or extreme vulnerability. Fear is an existential issue we all have somewhere deep within. People with trauma, childhood wounds, acute sensitivity (sometimes from birth trauma) and unstable childhoods are prone to this fear more than most. This fear is visceral, it’s not simply emotional or mental. It becomes physical, make no mistake. And that physicality we now know (through science and biology) can affect our gut microbiome, digestive process, gut permeability, ‘fight or flight’ mechanism, and adrenal glands, as well as the whole body. Every physical effect I have just stated impacts the immune system.

The deeper trouble with this is that it sets up a chronic pattern that may lock us in for life. If these things are happening in childhood and youth we learn them as survival mechanisms and repeat them every time something real OR IMAGINED reminds us of the old trauma. It doesn’t have to be a real threat, it can just be the thought of it or something similar. In fact much of this reactivity will happen IN ANTICIPATION of trouble THAT ACTUALLY DOESN’T HAPPEN.

This has been one of my ongoing life stories revealed to me over the years through various body work therapies, deep inner exploration and more recently chiropractic testing. I developed a secret inner part of me that was always alert to danger, always on the look out and hyper vigilant, whether I was asleep or not. The consequences of this are serious and disturbing, both physically and mentally. Physically it means being always in reactivity mode and high alert, and never able to get into deep restful delta sleep where healing and renewal comes from.

It means immune system and nervous system are on constant alert to danger. It began in my early teens during my parents slide into acrimonious divorce and my slide into ‘out of control’ drug taking chaos. It has lasted a lifetime (the effect not the drugs!), and been mostly hidden from view but had massive repercussions on my relationships, purpose in life and most important on my physical health. Specifically on my immune health, gut health, and now thyroid health. It also resulted in addiction problems.

So what does this say?

Well I actually see this reactivity, this over active ‘fight or flight’ mechanism, at play in many people I work with, and almost always with those who experience some form of auto immunity. And it can disguise itself in many ways. Being over critical of self or others is one way, being self hating (remember the ‘self attacking self’ phrase at the beginning of this article?), being extremely resentful, being highly anxious, fearful, angry or depressed are all permutations of the same thing, reactivity.

This blog piece is just the beginning of a much bigger conversation about mind and body and trauma, and about how the immune system gets over activated when we are young.

If we accept that reactivity might be an issue both physically and emotionally it gives us knowledge and insight, and puts us in a greater position to be able to take action.

What action? I am going to discuss this next time.

I would love to hear from you what you think, as I really don’t have all the answers, but thousands of questions that I love exploring.

And the next piece I think will be how to turn our unhealthy reactivity to a healthy and calm responsiveness so we can maintain calm in our inner world.

Thank you so much for reading, and please please comment and add something to the conversation. And share this is you feel moved to.

Auto Immune Causes – The Cat and Mouse Game – A Personal Tale

Some of you may know over the years I have been through many diagnoses ranging from the sublime to the ridiculous, but have suspected Thyroid problems for a while now. Hashimotos is an auto immune experience, and I have been through gut related auto immune in the form of colitis, so I carry a tendency and possibly a lingering causal issue.

I now have some definitive test results that reveal I am producing antibodies which means there is a problem with the thyroid and what might be called ‘an auto immune’ condition.

I now have something to work on. But honestly this area is a minefield of information and red herrings, false flags and holistic mystery.

Getting tested is important, but tests are so damn expensive, particularly when there are a myriad of tests.

Finding a professional, either a decent doctor or a functional doctor or a knowledgeable naturopath is very expensive and out of my range, so i’m in the thick of it with trying to unravel it for myself as much as possible.

Luckily I am healthy, or at least healthy enough to mitigate some of the symptoms and effects.

But thats not enough when there is attrition of the gland and body going on. I have to dig even deeper and find some causal factor.

Could be Epstein Barr virus.
Could be heavy metal.
Could be electro smog.
Could be the years of toxic drug overload.
Could be a genetic component.
Could be years of stress I carried.
Could be low testosterone.

You see the problem?

It is something of an anomaly to have this..I am actually super healthy on so many levels, and all indications are it just shouldn’t be so. So the question that must always be asked and pursued is WHY?

What is causing this reactivity in the cellular body? Over the years as I have healed my gut the inflammation markers have come down and down until now there is no sign of inflammation.

That doesn’t necessarily mean there is one. But something is in the system, or some imbalance in the system, that is creating this disturbance. It might be low grade infection (ala ‘Medical Medium’ suggestion that Epstein Barr virus is more at play in Hashimotos and auto immunity than we imagine. It could simply be years of toxic assault, mercury (now gone) and stress (which I carried for many years) and of course electro smog and all its joys..

And of course Im now 59 so the body is hanging and getting older, systems getting weaker, testosterone going down, and so on and so forth.

So the investigation continues, meanwhile I truly believe that one can at least offset damage and harm by living as though one were vibrantly well, consciously choosing healthy foods and exercise and attending to the mind and emotion. xx

Thats where I’m at. I am almost excited to have found out something definite. It gives me a direction to move in.

Thanks for reading!

My recent results.

The Need To Heal Old Wounds

From my personal experience, my research and coaching lots of clients I really have concluded this one simple yet profound truth:

When we deny old emotions and/or present difficult feelings we put an increased stress on our body, on our nervous system, immune system, and important organs like heart and thyroid, and our brain. Whether that actually ’causes’ illness or not is academic, because the bottom line is it really doesn’t help.

My holistic principle is to understand that which puts extra tax and burden on a delicate and finely balanced system (the human organism) is ultimately destructive, and will assist in early degradation of healthy life. As we age it gets harder and harder to bounce back and regenerate. Which means that as we get older we must get wiser and get MORE relaxed and more FREE of old burdens. Old burdens will rigidify us physically, mentally and spiritually unless we consciously release them. They might even kill us.

This point is not as nebulous or subtle as you may think. The river is meant to flow. If it doesn’t flow it stagnates. If it stagnates it becomes toxic and allows disease to happen. It is exactly the same with us. Energy is meant to flow through us. Old emotions and toxic thoughts impede this flow and become somehow ‘trapped’ in our cellular body. The same stagnation can happen. 

Thus detoxification is useful on the physical level AND the emotional energetic level. This proposition might annoy some people and even be dismissed as new age but I have experienced it and see it everywhere, and it is a self evident truth.

In my own healing journey, healing a huge auto immune condition (inflammatory bowel disease) it really wasn’t long in my detoxification process that I was propelled into the fury and powerful world of my pent up, hot, acidic and generally volatile emotions, the ones that I had buried and denied for years and years since the traumatic break up of my parents when I was 16 years old. I held on to the trauma for decades but could never access the pain and therefore never receive any healing. Make no mistake, trauma in the body, just because its not present in everyday experience, is powerful and dangerous. It’s not inert, meaning it doesn’t just sit there in a neutral state doing nothing. 

No, it has a negative power. It influences decisions, it can drive addictions and lifestyle choices. It ramps up stress response into hot stuff like rage or scary stuff like fear and anxiety. It may play a huge part in depression. It creates havoc with the nervous system and immune system, both of which have a DIRECT effect on health. It is known, for example, that stress has a direct impact on the gut micro biome, reducing healthy gut flora and allowing the ‘bad guys’ to gain the upper hand.

I truly believe that my healing had plateaued until I dived into my emotions. And then it catapulted into an increase in healing. It’s not the magic bullet but it is incredibly powerful.

I would go as far as to say you can’t truly heal without it.

If you are on the same journey that took me over 10 years, please listen. Do the emotional stuff. Find a way, find a resource. Follow your instinct for what your body wants, listen to your own inner voice, and get guidance from others who know this territory, and then fully embrace your healing. Even when it is difficult because dragging old stuff up hurts, still press on. It is far better that you meet the pain, and it hurts, and you release it, than you don’t meet it and it kills you.

I wish you love and blessings on your path.

Thanks for reading!